I have realized that my focus on becoming a better man has been all about admitting the truth about the man I had been: Callous Self-absorbed Addictive Personality Narcissistic A Liar   And while I check in with good men on a regular basis — often times I find myself seeing the Shadow more than … Continued

  Remember Hermey the Elf, from the Rank & Bass stop-motion classic Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer?   He’s a misfit who doesn’t want to make toys. He wants to be a dentist. He also declares to Rudolph that he wants to be independent.   One recent week in my life – I was told … Continued

Conor: Your stories never made sense to me. The Monster: Because humans are complicated beasts. You believe comforting lies, while knowing full well the painful truth that makes those lies necessary. In the end, Conor, it is not important what you think. It is only important what you do. Conor: So what do I do? … Continued

  “I am a needy man.” I’ve fought against that truth most of my adult life. Little boys (and girls) realize that they are needy. When I was a little boy, the expression of my neediness was raw and unfiltered. Back then, the style of expressing neediness was crying or yelling. Then I learned how … Continued

  Have you lived life a certain way, and basically that’s the way you’ve always done it? I remember when the crash happened. With tears streaming uncontrollably down I fell to my knees in front of my wife as I realized just how much pain I caused her sixteen years into our marriage.  The list … Continued

  Do you like music?  It’s funny how the lyrics of a song get into our head, they stay there. In fact, I’ll bet you can name most of the artists who sang these lyrics: “In the days of my youth, I was told what it means to be a man. Now I’ve reached that … Continued

  For years, I worked in youth ministry. Two things I now hate in life: Pizza. And youth. Just kidding (about the pizza).   Actually, one of the great joys of working in youth ministry was that I took kids on lots of trips. Camping, retreats, festivals – I enjoyed the travel and watching teens experience new … Continued

  The iconic picture above is on the eve of D-Day, June 6, 1944, of which this year marks the 72nd anniversary.  General Dwight Eisenhower is meeting with paratroopers from 101st Airborne Division, 2nd Battalion, 502nd Parachute Regiment, Company E. The man whose face is just above Ike’s thumb is William E. Hayes. He’s my … Continued

  I was very active in Boy Scouts in my youth. Part of the appeal was that I lived in the Samoset Council in Wisconsin. And we had Camp Tesomas (purposeful play on words). Camp Tesomas was where “Camping is King.”  Tesomas was the only camp whose logo was designed by Walt Disney himself. While … Continued

  Although the Christmas holiday season has come and gone, I’ve been thinking about a scene from one of my favorite holiday movies, Planes, Trains and Automobiles. The film was released in 1987. Steve Martin plays the role of Neal Page, a successful but buttoned-up marketing executive struggling to make it home for the holidays. In … Continued